Current Music Mood: Billy Joel - An Innocent Man - “Some people run from a possible fight, Some people figure they can never win, And even tho this is a fight I can lose, The accused is an innocent man.”

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Last night, my mom called me and we talked for a good while. I ended up sobbing on the phone but that was ok. If you can’t cry to your mom, who can you cry to?

I have been pretty emotionally stable about this whole Cook situation. People ask about her, or read this blog, and give me the old “wow, that sucks” looks and offers of condolences like she’s dead. I’m pretty good about putting an air of acting like I’m ok, saying that Mere will always have something for me to ride or that I will breed her. (Which always leads to a discussion…-Everyone- has their own stallion in mind they think I should breed Cook to. ) Secondly, because she is older and because she has had problems before, then everyone assumes that I should be ready for the realization that she might never be better and have to be retired.

I will tell you that it doesn’t matter. I’m not ready and I will never be.

But here is the part that bothered me last night.

My mom was asking how Miss went at the Moss and I was bragging on her, telling her how awesome she was, blah blah. And as I heard myself talking, it occurred to me that I really like this horse. How Miss has made the Cook situation easier. I know it sounds stupid to say but that’s the part that upsets me. I don’t want to think or believe that Cook is replace-able. So I cried.

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So here is the update on Cook.

Not been ridden since last Wednesday. She came out of the pasture this morning, FRESH. rearing. bucking, kicking out. I didn’t feel safe walking her on the road, so I walked her in the barn through the babies pasture in case she got away from me. She was sort of acting like an idiot, and that annoys me when she’s hot for no apparent reason, other than she hasn’t been getting worked and the fact she’s TB…. so I yelled at her, which I did NOT feel bad about … just cause ur hurt doesn’t mean u can act like a moron coming in for breakfast.

Later in the afternoon, I got on her and we trotted forever! until my legs (sore from yesterday) could take no more. she was good. we have a program in place for her, so we will see in a week where she is.

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Here is a pic I took early one morning of our TB pasture.  Cook is one of the 3.