I have been collecting quotes from my friends that have made me crackle. There might be one from YOU…. or about you… :-) Alot of these are inside jokes, so they prolly won’t be funny to anyone, except the people they involve.
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“He has some serious, serious mental problems”….

“Watching her clean his (her horse’s) shealth was like watching some bad pay-per-view”.

“Of course u can’t sit hard! You don’t have any junk in your trunk!”

“I don’t think you woke up this morning and said “I’m really gonna screw this up”…

“Only ice hockey now. I don’t play roller (hockey) anymore. I got kicked out… Actually I don’t know if I got kicked out of the league or the rink…. I guess we’ll find out Saturday when I play for some charity for a paralyzed kid”.

“Thanks for calling me ’stupid’…… I’ll call you tomorrow IF I can remember your number”.

(After watching me fall off of Cook).. “Well look on the bright side, if you were in a class, it wouldn’t have been a refusal ’cause u both went over the jump”

“____ (name withheld) told me he went out with *him*, and next thing you know he woke up, it was 4am, didn’t know where he was and didn’t know where his car was… which is cool when you’re 23, but not like.. when… you’re 40.”

“I’m only letting you touch me, because you got fired today”.

“You’re so weird it scares me”

“You know nothing about the female reproductive system, do you? We don’t produce milk at will!”

“It tastes good, it gets you high… what’s not to like?!!?”

“I don’t care if he’s 50! 60! 80! … with a cane and wooden teeth… I’m still whupping his ass!”

“I’m not playing paintball with Scott. He’ll shoot me…. it doesn’t MATTER if he’s on my team. He’ll shoot me anyway.”

“Do I really have to break up with her?  Can’t I just stop calling her?  And change my number.  And move.?”